Redeeming Marriage: Dysfunction & Divorce

{Various Passages}

[Rev. Dwight Yoo]

In today's day and age, there are many broken and functionally dead marriages. Kevin D. Young's outline was used as the structure. Our church does have a stance, let us know.

Major Principles on Marriage

God designed marriage to be lifelong - Matthew 19:4-6
Divorce is not ALWAYS sinful. - Matthew 19:7-8
Divorce is permitted, but not required on the grounds of sexual immorality - Matthew 19:9
Divorce is permitted, but not required on the ground of desertion by an unbelieving spouse. - 1 Corinthians 7:15
When the divorce was not permissible, any subsequent remarriage results in adultery - Matthew 19:9
In situations where the divorce was permissible, remarriage is also permissible.

This is only an overview. If you have questions, please speak to me or one of the elders.

Now for those who have divorced and have just learned they have not done so biblically... God forgives. You are not fated to live life as a second-class citizen. God covers over the gravest of all sins.

For those of us who are not divorced, do not vilify those who have divorced. We are all sinners before God. Do not make divorce some sort of special sin or landmark issue.

For those who are married or planning to marry, I have a recommended read: When Sinners Say I Do.

Practices for Building a Healthy Marriage and Preventing Marital Breakdown.

1) Prioritize YOUR own sin. - 1 Timothy 1:15

When conflicts happen, consider your own heart in light of God's view of our sin... and the example of Christ. We are not supposed to compare to our spouse. We are supposed to see our own sin first.

A Set of writers were asked to write on a topic... "What's wrong with the world?" One of the clearest responses comes from a Christian apologist and writer... "Dear Sirs, I am. Sincerely, G.K. Chesterton"

2) Recognize and repent of Ruling Desires (James 4:1-3)

When circumstances come and you do something, it was because this was already in your heart. While there are plainly sinful desires, there are some desires that are not inherently sinful. But when we take normal non-sinful desires and make them demands, they become sinful. Good things that become ultimate... can only be idols. They have displaced God. When these demands are not met, we judge and subsequently, punish our spouses. Punishment can come in the form of stonewalling, withdrawal, and lashing out. We need to recognize that what we seek does not deliver the satisfaction and fulfillment we desire... only God delivers this.